Anger is an immediate reaction to an obstacle.It is a strong negative emotion of displeasure, hostility or fury that might occur to anyone on any occasion.Anger generates other bad feelings such as fear, disgust, shame, irritability, outrage, hostility and even violence and the aggressive response it generates can harm you.Anger is a punishment to you for somebody's fault.Anger changes the behavior pattern of the person as a result of changes in his emotional status.It is accompanied by physiological and biological changes.Actions resulting from anger often lead to undesirable physiological and health consequences, because the neuro-transmitters/hormones (eg.Adrenaline) released during anger intensify impulsive action and obscure rational thought processes.It may raise your heart rate, the blood pressure and may result in hot reactions.If you hold on to anger so long it will give you tense muscles, stress and unhappiness.Anger is a silent killer.According to Mark Twain anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.Anger can lead to problems at home, at work and elsewhere.It spoils the quality of your life wherever you are.Anger can destroy your relationship with your spouse, colleagues and others.The degree of your anger, the manifestation of it and the length of you staying in anger, need skillful management to avoid further problems.We can be angry on the right grounds, against the right persons, in the right manner at the right moment for the right length of time.But remember not to cross those borderlines any time.Dealing with anger is a difficult matter and requires a lot of skills.Expressing, suppressing and calming are the three ways of dealing with anger.The healthiest way is to express your feelings in an assertive - and not aggressive - manner.Suppressing your anger and then converting or re-directing it to other positive ways, is another way.This way of handling of anger can cause hypertension, high blood pressure or depression.You can defuse anger through diversion, distraction, humor or by talking about it, so as to calm you down.The third way is to force you to calm down inside, by controlling internal responses.You can be angry every day but learn not to show it so as to minimize the problems it may create, by any strategic manner.Culture does not allow one to show anger.If anger is not allowed to express, it stays in disguise.Anger built up over years can break even marriages.The best way to manage anger is to reduce the intensity of your emotional feelings and the physiological arousal.You can ignore what has happened or to choose to shrug it off.When someone does something which you don't like, why do you react to it by resorting to anger? When you are caught with anger, you should deal with it tactfully by pausing for a moment and reflecting on the situation.Then you can skillfully respond to the person who triggered your anger without attacking him.You cannot avoid or change the people that enrage you.But the easier possibility is that you can control your reactions.The real cause of your anger is inside you and not on others.Those who get angry easily have low tolerance, physiologically or genetically.Easily angered people come from disruptive and chaotic families.When you get angry, think whether that element of anger is inevitable.We can consciously train ourselves to tolerate frustration or irritation without getting angry too much.You can deal with anger by accepting things and events as they are and realizing that you cannot change all the situations or individuals that irritate you.If you are angry, admit it to yourself and avoid prolonging it.Prolonging anger can lead you to self-destruction or self-defeat.Do not stay back with anger so long.Think of ways to express it constructively.You can express your anger to any one who triggered your anger directly or over phone or in writing.But ensure that your reaction is calm, assertive and not aggressive.Aggressive way may escalate your hurt feelings.As well, if you feel so angry, you can talk your reactions to yourself or to any another person or even to a pet to unburden yourself and to discharge the anger.Don't postpone this till when you have overcome the anger and are feeling good later.Physical ventilation or exertion can drain off your anger.Do exercise, sports or physical activity to reduce anger.Mediate regularly to overcome anger overload.The positive aspect of anger is that it helps us to recognize something is wrong somewhere.But don't get angry on anything and everything.When you get angry, choose to let it off, take a few breaths, or countdown to ten, or analyse why you are upset.Realizing that you are caught with anger is the right way to begin to deal with it.All your anger is about something what has happened in the past or will happen in the future and not what is happening in the present moment.So if you can be in the present moment you cannot hold on to anger for long.So be in the present moment to avoid holding on to anger.Physical exercises can relieve your anger.Let us look at the Kids.They get angry anytime and manage it beautifully.When they are in anger, they express their feelings openly, directly and allow it to go.Within minutes, they can start laughing, playing and leaving the anger behind by choosing to 'live in the present moment'.Nurture the nature of a child to deal with anger.Anger will affect the quality of your life and the productivity at work.If you don't do anything about managing your anger, it will cause problems to you, and others in the society in which you live.The best way to deal with anger is to understand the nuances of anger.Manage it skillfully and lead a happier life.
0 comments:
Post a Comment