The world can be a dark place.The news is full of stories of loss and suffering.It isn't easy for anyone to remain positive or upbeat with all the problems plaguing our society.But anyone can create a small haven of peace in the world by treating people well and using simple but effective strategies for conducting winning relationships -- stubbornly optimistic strategies that will make any person or business prosper.If people enjoy your company and find that having relationships with you is enjoyable and fulfilling, you will always be loved.You will make the world a better place by giving your special gift of personality and good will to others.The simplest and most effective way of winning with people is to be a persistent optimist.When we are positive and hopeful people NOTICE.And they react accordingly.A genuinely positive person can actually influence the brain states of others for the better.Two Radically Different Case Scenarios.First, think about how you feel when someone who is always complaining and talking about the world's unsolvable problems comes along.Their bitterness shows.And their pain spills onto all who will listen.This type of person paints the world in dark colors.It is hard to resist feeling a little depressed.Second, now picture how you respond when a really positive and upbeat person walks into the room.The world appears light and airy, and full of sunshine.How do you feel? You feel good and the serotonin is flowing in your brain again.Let's imagine this positive person has an uplifting conversation with you.The two of you talk about good things, you smile and laugh.This person's energy is contagious.You are surrounded by good vibrations.Not anger and hopelessness.Nor feelings of despair and doom.You find this individual's optimism thoroughly intoxicating!Isn't it interesting how some people drain you or make you feel exhausted .Whereas others give you an emotional boost and make you feel as though you are on top of the world?OK, I know these are extremes, and most people fall in the middle somewhere.And that's my point.If you fall in the mediocre range are you really going to succeed famously with people?What will distinguish you from the next person?Action Step.Now ask yourself a question. how do you affect others? Do people truly look forward to seeing you? Do you fill them with good cheer or bring them down? Do people tolerate you because they have to, or do they truly want to be with you?Most people don't stop long enough to reflect on the impact they are having on others.But it is a good habit to develop.And, since circumstances in our lives are always changing, it is a good idea to engage in self reflection fairly often.Even a typically positive person can have a temporary setback.Yet, if he/she is aware of the problem, he/she can usually fix it.It's especially important to be positive and strong with people who treat you negatively.If you don't inject a positive energy into the situation, how will it ever improve?To begin winning with people in a powerful way, ask yourself what impact you want to have on your close friends and associates, your family and other members of your community.Look for honest answers.Evaluate your behavior critically and muster the courage to see whether you are behaving in a way that is consistent with your goals.If you're like most people, you'll find room for improvement.A Shining star.Norman Vincent Peale, whom I met a few years before his death, believed there was no rational argument for not staying positive in all things.When you are consistently positive and optimistic, you are like a magnet, or a shining star, and you draw people to you.I know I will never forget the impression Mr.Peale made on me .Just being near him was akin to walking on air.When you find every conceivable opportunity for shining your light on someone, for being upbeat, optimistic and hopeful, you are providing a much needed service.You are making people feel better and giving them a little bit of your strength.In return, they will believe in you .And follow you.People will want to be with you and they will be there for you when you need them.By constantly striving to have a more optimistic and beneficial impact on others, you grow your own resiliency and improve your relationship with yourself and the world.You become more focused on the good than bad.And you become stronger and happier.By going through each day trying to be more positive in your interactions with others, you can make a big difference in the outlook of other people.And, yes, you will leave the world in better shape than you found it at the start of the day.And what an impressive accomplishment!Follow These Tips To Improve Your Daily Impact.1.If you want to succeed with people in a big way, do your part in counteracting the overwhelming negativity in the world.Begin by evaluating yourself and making improvements in both your attitude and behavior.When you do so, everyone wins.Including you.2.Realize that when you find fault with others, or blame them for your misery, you make it almost impossible for them (and yourself) to be optimistic.It is better to train yourself to focus on the strengths of others and to find the positives in difficult situations.It will be much easier to remain optimistic, which will make you more successful in the long run.3.Give yourself the gift of positive action.Remember, you can win with people if you begin with yourself, and behave in ways that inspire them to be their best.That's the crux of leadership.Care about people, act favorably and responsibly toward the individuals and groups you influence, and together they will be able to accomplish more.Some may think optimists are fools.Others may feel that keeping a positive mental attitude is old fashioned.In reality, nothing will make you more successful or get you quicker results with people than being stubbornly optimistic.
Wednesday, September 26, 2012
Winning Relationships - A Powerful Way of Succeeding With the People in Your Life
The world can be a dark place.The news is full of stories of loss and suffering.It isn't easy for anyone to remain positive or upbeat with all the problems plaguing our society.But anyone can create a small haven of peace in the world by treating people well and using simple but effective strategies for conducting winning relationships -- stubbornly optimistic strategies that will make any person or business prosper.If people enjoy your company and find that having relationships with you is enjoyable and fulfilling, you will always be loved.You will make the world a better place by giving your special gift of personality and good will to others.The simplest and most effective way of winning with people is to be a persistent optimist.When we are positive and hopeful people NOTICE.And they react accordingly.A genuinely positive person can actually influence the brain states of others for the better.Two Radically Different Case Scenarios.First, think about how you feel when someone who is always complaining and talking about the world's unsolvable problems comes along.Their bitterness shows.And their pain spills onto all who will listen.This type of person paints the world in dark colors.It is hard to resist feeling a little depressed.Second, now picture how you respond when a really positive and upbeat person walks into the room.The world appears light and airy, and full of sunshine.How do you feel? You feel good and the serotonin is flowing in your brain again.Let's imagine this positive person has an uplifting conversation with you.The two of you talk about good things, you smile and laugh.This person's energy is contagious.You are surrounded by good vibrations.Not anger and hopelessness.Nor feelings of despair and doom.You find this individual's optimism thoroughly intoxicating!Isn't it interesting how some people drain you or make you feel exhausted .Whereas others give you an emotional boost and make you feel as though you are on top of the world?OK, I know these are extremes, and most people fall in the middle somewhere.And that's my point.If you fall in the mediocre range are you really going to succeed famously with people?What will distinguish you from the next person?Action Step.Now ask yourself a question. how do you affect others? Do people truly look forward to seeing you? Do you fill them with good cheer or bring them down? Do people tolerate you because they have to, or do they truly want to be with you?Most people don't stop long enough to reflect on the impact they are having on others.But it is a good habit to develop.And, since circumstances in our lives are always changing, it is a good idea to engage in self reflection fairly often.Even a typically positive person can have a temporary setback.Yet, if he/she is aware of the problem, he/she can usually fix it.It's especially important to be positive and strong with people who treat you negatively.If you don't inject a positive energy into the situation, how will it ever improve?To begin winning with people in a powerful way, ask yourself what impact you want to have on your close friends and associates, your family and other members of your community.Look for honest answers.Evaluate your behavior critically and muster the courage to see whether you are behaving in a way that is consistent with your goals.If you're like most people, you'll find room for improvement.A Shining star.Norman Vincent Peale, whom I met a few years before his death, believed there was no rational argument for not staying positive in all things.When you are consistently positive and optimistic, you are like a magnet, or a shining star, and you draw people to you.I know I will never forget the impression Mr.Peale made on me .Just being near him was akin to walking on air.When you find every conceivable opportunity for shining your light on someone, for being upbeat, optimistic and hopeful, you are providing a much needed service.You are making people feel better and giving them a little bit of your strength.In return, they will believe in you .And follow you.People will want to be with you and they will be there for you when you need them.By constantly striving to have a more optimistic and beneficial impact on others, you grow your own resiliency and improve your relationship with yourself and the world.You become more focused on the good than bad.And you become stronger and happier.By going through each day trying to be more positive in your interactions with others, you can make a big difference in the outlook of other people.And, yes, you will leave the world in better shape than you found it at the start of the day.And what an impressive accomplishment!Follow These Tips To Improve Your Daily Impact.1.If you want to succeed with people in a big way, do your part in counteracting the overwhelming negativity in the world.Begin by evaluating yourself and making improvements in both your attitude and behavior.When you do so, everyone wins.Including you.2.Realize that when you find fault with others, or blame them for your misery, you make it almost impossible for them (and yourself) to be optimistic.It is better to train yourself to focus on the strengths of others and to find the positives in difficult situations.It will be much easier to remain optimistic, which will make you more successful in the long run.3.Give yourself the gift of positive action.Remember, you can win with people if you begin with yourself, and behave in ways that inspire them to be their best.That's the crux of leadership.Care about people, act favorably and responsibly toward the individuals and groups you influence, and together they will be able to accomplish more.Some may think optimists are fools.Others may feel that keeping a positive mental attitude is old fashioned.In reality, nothing will make you more successful or get you quicker results with people than being stubbornly optimistic.
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